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“Weeping is not the same thing as crying. It takes your whole body to weep, and when it’s over, you feel like you don’t have any bones left to hold you up.”
Sarah Ockler, Twenty Boy Summer

A Day In The Life of A Serial Killer

Working outside is great even if it means remaining in the direct sun for extended periods. Remain long enough in the fresh air and the abundant sunlight and Nature will occasionally show you a violent underbelly to the order of things.

The last couple summers I have noticed a hawk that spends all of its time moving from tree to tree eating babies for breakfast.  There is nothing as raw as a display of a bird of prey in action.

Immensely satisfying.  The cycle of power and prey.

There is a dark side to this.  When his majesty the hawk moves around the golf course he is followed by an entourage of brave little birds fighting to protect their young, darting, swooping and pecking the shit out of his head.

It’s satisfying to see the underdog win.

You would never have guessed that small birds could be so violent and aggressive until you’ve watched them defend their nests from this notorious baby killer.

I feel for them.

You would never have guessed that small birds could be so violent and aggressive until you’ve watched them defend their nests from this notorious baby killer.

Normally I would dismiss this behavior as part of nature, who was I to interfere?

On odd days I would even laugh to myself to see the hawk getting harrassed, but I never once considered the wake of destruction a predator such as he leaves behind.  His victims have spent endless hours gathering twigs and mud to build a safe environment to create a family, just to have it ruined by a five-minute breakfast.

Does he care?

Do Your Routines Create Value?

The hawk vs the world didn’t matter until my wife showed me a viral video.  A young lady stands in a line with her two children, waiting to pay for her goods in a store.

The eldest child wandered off by the door and was looking at something.  Without warning a figure bursts through the door and snatches the child and runs off.  A bystander and the mother immediately rush after.

I was shocked.

Although this scenario is rare,  it changed how I view that damn baby killing machine.  Aka Mr. Hawk.  I now hope at some point the victims prevail and the greedy hawk gets what’s coming to him.

Maybe he will lose an eyeball.

That would be a small price to pay for his murderous appetite.

When I saw the video I was forced to put myself in that woman’s shoes.  She was acting the part of a typical mother.  Her child was no more than five feet from her and well within sight and “boom” she was gone.


If this had happened to me what would I have done?

Occasionally I carry one of my boys and let the other walk around.  If they are listening well and I trust they are not going to bolt and run on the road, I will give them the opportunity to explore on their own.

What the heck would I do if some freak ran out and grabbed one of them?  Do I leave one to fend for himself and chase down the baby thief?

Let’s hope that I never have to make that decision.

A Cure For Blindness

Here is the answer to the question that nobody wants to ask:

Practice mindfulness with your children and stay present!  Although Facebook has 13 notifications that are very important forget about that crap!  Don’t you dare give a predator an opportunity to completely “F” your life up now and forever.

Don’t worry, perverts are not waiting around ALL corners to “eat your babies”, but take comfort in the fact that it only takes one.  I’m exaggerating here but it does pay to be prepared.

There’s an incident that pains me to tell which occurred in the driveway to our current house.  It made me realize the real problem with stupidity as a parent, and it’s when you don’t recognize when you are taking unnecessary risk.

At least if you know the danger, and proceed with caution, there is a semblance of a chance.  Unfortunately, I didn’t see this one coming, and therefore I am grateful that I can tell the story without it being a tragedy.

Learn From The Mistakes Of Others

Any father of twins can tell you there are differences regardless if they are identical.  This is the beauty of being human.

My son Sawyer is a daring young boy who loves to venture far beyond the bit of rope given, usually far beyond my comfort level.  It’s a difficult balance letting him explore the world, versus reeling him in so he doesn’t injure himself.

High stakes.

When I loaded the boys into the stroller to go on a walk in the neighborhood, and I felt totally safe allowing Sawyer freedom to explore the “contained” driveway area between our house and the neighbors.

A simple blink can change everything.

For a brief moment, I  looked down to buckle Hunter into the stroller and then turned my attention back to Sawyer who had been looking at the bike leaning on the side of the house.

I had no idea that things were out of control.

This was the inattentive gap that I could have regret for the rest of my life.  I cannot imagine the conversation between the father bird and momma bird explaining how Mr. hawk had just ingested their progeny for breakfast!

Do You Sacrifice The Child Or The Tree?

From the time I looked down and buckled Hunter in, Sawyer had disappeared.  I called his name with no response.

My first thought is that he’d managed to bump the gate to the backyard open and had wandered in and began to play.

He wasn’t in the backyard.

I felt panic and ran around yelling his name desperately searching the area, up and down the street but couldn’t find him.

I felt a fear like no other.

Children are stress incarnate.

After an eternal moment, Sawyer squealed with excitement and revealed himself from his hiding place behind the neighbors evergreen tree.

I could tell he loved this exhilarating game of hide-n-seek, despite the toll on his daddy.  I felt the anger rising in response to the loss of control.

Deep emotions.

What Can You Learn From Mistakes?

If you have a demanding job and you are tired when you get home, it is way easier to sit down and relax with a pint of beer and watch your children run around the yard than it is to interact with them.

Beware the temptation to check out!

Children grow every second, an increment within the moment.  Cherish this opportunity because they are gone once they are wasted.


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